My Daily 3's turns 1 today!

October 4, 2015 

One year ago, this was my first post.

At the time, I had no intentions other than to shift my thinking, implementing  some of my own advice .

 For those of you who are not familiar with my back story, here is an every so brief summary. 

I was widowed at 41.  A native Californian  living in Northfield MN. Steve extended an olive branch to me when Scott passed. We had known each other since the 7th grade and graduated high school together.You see, he had experienced his wife passing 3 years earlier. He understood  how challenging the first year would be. Our relationship grew into what it is today, it is uniquely ours. 2 widows, 3 boys. A modern day Brady Bunch minus girls, our new blended family. 


The boys and I moved from MN into SR's home with his son Luke.  We knew that this would not be our forever home. We knew the town where our next house needed to be and began actively looking. At the same time were prepping Steve's house for sale.

The house went on  the market after July 4 weekend. Sold in 4 days, 20 day escrow, all CASH.... How does that happen? We had yet to find a house to buy!! Oh crap. 

Life went into complete get'er done mode..... You know what I mean, the panic of the oh shit, we have 20 days... pack, find a house and oh, move....

Well, lets just say, we didn't find a house in 20 days. We ended up moving into what I call a cozy original bungalow (can you read between the lines?) So original that we had one outlet in the kitchen! yup  circa 1950's.

Mentally, I knew moving into this place,  was only temporary.  I am a firm believer you can do anything you set your mind to. Living in the cozy bungalow with an insane commute to get the boys to school and their sporting activities,was only temporary I kept telling myself. I knew that we would eventually find our family home. It was a discouraging process but in retrospect necessary.

We moved into this cozy bungalow with the mindset, 3 months, we will definitely have found  our next home in 3 months....

3 months turned into 7... 

After we moved in. The dust settled so to speak and I was staring at what I was calling home.Dark wood paneling, 1200 square feet, cozy for this family of 5 and at the time 2 Labradors . I  had to pull up my big girl panties and say to myself, I can make anyplace feel like home dammit. 

I did need to call in support, at least to paint. I knew that living with dark paneling was the easiest fix. A fresh coat of white paint went up and made a significant difference, the house felt cleaner, like a quaint cottage. Or at least that is how I decided to spin it in my own mind.

I would sit in the house and feel overwhelmed at all that transpired for us to be living there. It was pretty craptastic, I'm not gonna lie. I decided that the way I was going to change my mindset was to take 3 pictures a day of appreciation.Things that made me smile, things that might not make a difference to anyone else on the planet, but for me on that day, it did. I had to shift my thinking. 

 This is where my #daily 3 began.  My first #daily 3 posted Oct 4,2014.

My dinner at the Habit, morning coffee with coconut oil and being able to enjoy some time with Mitchell while the little's were at football practice. Like I said, not earth shattering by any means... but this was my transitional life...

In the past year, we bought the RNB (Rogers n Brachmann for those unfamiliar) Demo, remodel and move has happened. Commute time has been replaced with boys riding bikes to school and friends knocking at the door wondering if boys can play... : )

I continued posting, for my own sanity mostly. What happened next was such a huge surprise.... I started receiving emails... from people who found my posts and were thanking me... I thought to myself... why? my daily 3 have been purely a therapeutic posting for me.. how could my daily 3 make a difference in other peoples lives? interesting how life works...

So while I really was challenged to live in that cozy original bungalow in Reseda, something amazing began....

This has been quite a journey..In all truth, I am a bit taken aback by the response but think it is pretty awesome. It makes my heart happy to know that my personal daily 3 has turned into something that others look for. It has become fun within the family and friends what will make it into my 3... These are snapshots of my life, what make me smile...

So there you have it my story of #daily3 

If you are interested in #daily3, you can follow on instagram Blisswithmac, Face Book or Twitter.... although, in all honesty, I'm not so Twitter savvy.... 

I want to personally thank all of you that have followed this journey of #daily3 from the beginning.I also want to thank first time readers. I look forward to seeing where it goes from here! Please feel free to share my links : )



Wishing you all the best
with Peace, Love, Blessings and Gratitude
Mac

The shift is the gift

Sept 7, 2015


Shifting your thinking....

I woke up in the middle of the night last week with an idea. An idea that kept me awake as I tried to force myself back to sleep.I acknowledged what was happening, made a mental note of the idea and then I was able to fall back to sleep. That sentence will make sense in a minute. You see, this has happened to me in the past.

It first happened after my dad died in 1989. At the time I was 18, and I admit  I was freaked out after watching my father take his last breath and leave this physical world. I found it very difficult to sleep for the months to follow.

Several months later, I had a life changing conversation with a family member. Lola explained to me, not to be afraid of my dad making contact with me in my dreams. That I needed to change my way of  thinking. She went on to tell me it was a gift. I think I looked at her in utter disbelief, so she went on to explain that  he was visiting me, not to have me feel scared but to reassure. To know that his spirit was alive and well. That he would always be with me, while not in his physical body but in spirit.

That was a lot for my teenage brain to wrap my head around. Not gonna lie. That seed was planted and needed a lot of water.... 

Fast forward.

Scott died suddenly in the shower of a massive heart attack. My boys unfortunately found him with my dear neighbor.

I was in shock. It was devastating.

When people began to ask me how I was doing, Something shifted my thoughts. I would say to them this:

1) I am happy that the bad guys didn't kill him. That my boys will never feel the need to seek revenge.(having been in the Seal Teams for 21 years there was a possibility of this)

2) There was no question about if he suffered. The coroner said it was very clear he was gone before he hit the ground.

3) I couldn't imagine having to transport his body back from overseas. He had just returned from Africa 4 days earlier. He was home. I have a friend whose husband passed in Iraq. By the time his body was returned and an autopsy was performed, all tests proved inconclusive. She was left with no closure.

I focused on the silver lining of the shitty cloud I was under.

The shift in my thinking had happened without me even realizing. How and why I have no reason or answers.

It just happened. It was a gift.

When I meet people for the first time and they have been told the story, they look at me and say they are sorry. I think this is an automatic response. My usual response goes something like this, there is no need to apologize for what I have gone through. It has molded me into the person I have become. I did the work, learned valuable lessons and am far stronger and wiser than I ever could have imagined.


I had read a book years ago by Elizabeth Lesser called Broken Open. It is a powerful book with several short stories of people going through tragic situations. The premise was this, you can continue to live your first life.... or you can phoenix from the ashes of the tragedy and live a second life with meaning and purpose. Not forgetting the events, but using the knowledge one gains in those times to help others. 

Shifting you thinking

I hashtag #theshiftisthegift all the time on my social media. I am a firm believer that you can rise and phoenix, if you choose. Shifting your thinking does not have to refer only to when tragedy strikes. It can be usefully applied in day to day situations.

 I use the example of my mom. When she was diagnosed with Rheumatoid years ago,she was put on Lasix. A medication to decrease fluid retention. She had to pee a lot. She was letting me know how tired she was getting up and down having to go to the bathroom. I explained to her she needed to shift her thinking... She needed to think of transitioning from sit <--> stand as an exercise. It was an opportunity to get her legs stronger. 

At first she looked at me like I was a bit nutzo and laughed.Then she realized the logic. Now?... my mom does not mention the Lasix side effects. If anything, she tells me how many "squats"she gets in during the day!

I woke up the other night, with the idea of writing a blog about shifting thinking.I have come to accept my thoughts that come during my sleep as a gift from the other side, just as Lola explained so many years ago.

In truth, I am not sure why the idea came to me.I choose to trust my inner compass and my gut. I firmly believe someone out there in need of  guidance in shifting their mindset. Possibly this little blog of mine can make a difference.

Wishing you all the best,

first born, first ticket

Aug 12,2015

wow, what a week it has been and it's only Wednesday! 

let me start this blog by saying that this blog has no other intention except to put my thoughts down. there is no health,lets get exercising making good food choices information here. This is me, Macara  and my thoughts on life in blog. There are no editors making  grammatical corrections for me, changing sentence structure. There are going to be run on sentences and to be completely honest,it is exactly how I wish it to be. For those that know me, they know how I speak, my personality, my energy. It is my intention to bring the essence of my spirit to the pages of this blog.

With that said, lets get down to business , the topic of the blog....the story of Mitchell Scott Brachmann and his first ticket...

Oh man. 

Let me go back for a moment to remind readers of our  basic story.

Steve and I are both widowed. We have known each other since 7th grade. We graduated high school together way back in 1987. We went our separate ways after graduation... we are together not by chance, the ones we loved brought us together. our story is uniquely ours and a blog for another day. Lets just say, I never in a million years would have thought that I would be widowed at 41 and living back in CA ,with SR and our beautiful crazy life.

I trusted the process.

Back to Mitchell. 

Summer of 2014

Mitchell  was going into 9th grade  and  really wanted to take a specific AP class, Human Geography. I learned to take this AP class in the fall, he had to go to summer school, to take a pre-requisite course for 3 weeks. Fine, I thought.... Then I was informed that summer school is not free!I thought! The class would cost,(not going to be accurate on this) between $300-400 for 3 weeks (!?!) The cost took me by surprise, but  after a few heart to heart conversations, I realized how much he wanted to take this class,so  summer school was a go.

The deal we made was this.... he would  have to ride his(new) bike to and from school. He needed to show increased responsibility. At the time we were living in Steve's old house which was close to Calabassas High School, where the district had scheduled summer school. He was willing. 3 weeks in total. easy he thought....

I will say this, I was apprehensive about him riding his bike on the busy streets of Woodland Hills and Calabassas. This was definitely not Northfield MN! Lots of traffic, busy streets...I drove him the route which we felt was safest. I explained which side of the street to  bike and the crosswalks to use etc.

 I was uncomfortable thinking of him biking to school,to say the least. I think any parent with their first born feels these same things.You have to allow their growth,  as uncomfortable as it may be.  So I said a quiet prayer as I watched him head out the door the first day. I waited anxiously for him to bike up the driveway and tell me about his day.

3 weeks.....

In the  3 weeks, he got 7 flat tires, 3 in one day. No joke. I still don't know exactly how that one happened. I believe Steve and I were out of town and my mom was watching the boys.  He was pretty flustered as anyone would have been. I think he ended up  watching some you tube videos on how to change a tire since my mom wasn't too much help!

The last day of school arrived July 24,2014.. Final day....

I receive a  text... a picture of a ticket... huh? 

He goes on to tell me the story.. my mom and I laughed. A lot...

He did what he had done for the prior 3 weeks, crossed at the crosswalks went onto campus.. 

the last day, a police officer on a moped was sitting in  a driveway of a home next to the school. Pulled him over...

his offense? 

riding his bicycle against traffic for approximately 50 feet in the bike lane...

He had not brought his ID with him on the last day. Mitchell was truthful and gave the officer all of his information, was issued the ticket and was late to his final. The little boys couldn't believe he actually told the officer his true name,age,address etc. It was quite funny to listen to the banter between them. As a parent I was proud that he told the truth.

To say it flustered him was an understatement.

You see in our old home town in MN, police officers would stop kids for wearing their helmets and give them Dairy Queen or Culvers coupons as a reward!

Mitchell honestly thought he was being punked. He couldn't believe that it was happening and the officer was serious about the violation!

I told him I was not upset with him and we would handle the issue. It was a great topic of conversation for the rest of the summer..Nobody we spoke to could believe an actual ticket was issued!

We all agreed that it was an awfully slow crime day in Calabassas....

As summer came to a close, Mitchell and I went to the courthouse to wrap the looming ticket issue up with a big bow. Pay the fine and call it lesson learned....

$470 fine... 

the woman behind the counter was mortified at the violation and that the officer actually wrote the ticket! Quietly, she gave us words of advice told us what court room to ask for and to go to court.

So we did, 1st court date April 16,2015!

Yes, that is correct... 

We get back from Spring Break in Hawaii and have court that week. 

He wanted to tell the judge his side of the story. 

So we sat in a courtroom with 270 other people. It was traffic court. It was straight from a Key and Peele substitute teacher skit with roll call

in-case you havent seen.... 


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dd7FixvoKBw

With the ethnic diversity of traffic court, listening the deputy attempt pronouncing challenging names made me smile.

What I was not expecting in traffic court was to  have a pre-recorded audio tape (imagine in the airplane) with instructions played...

basically,

The judge will hear you plea,
1)guilty
2)not guilty
3)no contest
Have your ducks in a row, be ready.... time is valuable..

Holy crap, I looked at Mitchell and thought, well, so much for telling your story. 
You are guilty, yes, but you didn't know the law!!! I was not feeling like a very good mom at that moment, I lacked solid advice. I kept thinking oh shit, stay calm... 

He was called up in the first group, third called to the stand.

She read his charges aloud,  recognized what she had read, took off her glasses looked him in the eyes and asked how he was. He was scared. My heart was pounding out of my chest, I kept intentionally taking long exhales to stay calm for outward appearances.

When I say that the entire courtroom sighed at the reading of his charges that is not an exaggeration....you could hear people say, things like I cant believe he got a ticket for that!

The judge said, "Well I know I feel safer seeing what cars are coming toward me while I ride my bike, but I know the law"....He replied, "I do too,  I didn't know the law your honor"

He pled with tears in his eyes, no contest...

20 hours of community service.!?!

We were escorted to the side door to fill out paperwork. He sat there quietly in the corner, I could see he was going to lose it, 20 hours of community service for this? then the flood gates opened...pent up emotions all released....

I did my best to calm him, reassure him, hold him, allow him his journey, but try to get him to listen...

The wonderful ladies behind the counter got out their white out rollers and started telling him he was able to change his plea and not to worry about any of this, it was not going to be a permanent mark on his record, he was a minor.  He finally heard them...

He decided to change his plea,but we had to wait until all 270 people had been called to the stand.In total we waited 4 hours. Thankfully, Mitchell's anxiety had time to subside, as he was able to witness a few people who were standing before the judge clearly not telling the full truth. He was able to watch the process from the third party perspective and gain some understanding of the process...

We were the only ones left in the court room... finally our turn..


The judge called him back up. She said, "Well I see Mr. Brachmann that you haven't seen me enough today and  you want to change your plea." 

The judge took her time explaining to him  all the different scenarios so he understood the law and his options. He stood there and said, "I simply want to tell you my side of the story your honor. " My heart melted.

He pled no contest... trial set, Aug 10,2015.

Fast forward...

Has it been in the back of our minds he was going to court? of course. Did the looming date create uneasy feelings? Oh yeah it did... what was the worst thing that could happen? We discussed. The officer would show up and each would tell the judge their side.(I did have him take an online bicycle safety course to show that he was taking responsibility for his actions...)  Worst case scenario, he would get 20 hours of community service and hopefully he could have it count for school volunteer hours as well. He was ready for whatever was going to happen.


We waited patiently outside the same courtroom. Several police officers began arriving... I would ask him, do any look familiar? He couldn't remember.

The courtroom's energy was different this time.... All were here for trial....
Officers were designated to one side of the room, civilians the other... we sat and waited patiently....

No pre-recorded directions this time....

We continued to sit with some anxiety not knowing if the officer was going to show.

His name was called for check in.

After 30 minutes, the same Judge we had in April called his name....

She said ,"Your officer did not arrive, your case is DISMISSED!!!"

For those of you who follow  BLISS with Mac, my #daily3 pictures of appreciation on FB or Instagram , I posted these for Aug 10.. I took them walking out of the courtroom...

Although more than 3 pictures for the day, I had to capture me taking some much needed moments of quiet once we returned home...

Here is the original ticket, barely readable... although I thought it would be fun to frame, I think it will find it's place in a memory box to be looked at many years from now, only a distant memory.

I want to thank the officer for not showing up. Although a small part of me wanted to see the man who actually had given a 13 year old a ticket for this offense instead of a warning... At the end of the day, I remind myself, it was exactly as it was supposed to be.

We were outside our comfort zone, there was growth, many lessons learned and maturity gained from July 24,2014 to Aug 10,2015.


Being a mom is the most challenging jobs I have been given. It also is the most rewarding. 

Life is about the journey.... embrace the moments...

All the best,

My #daily 3

Wow, July 21, 2015.

Time flies.

April was the last time that I blogged about life. 

I wanted to take the opportunity to write about my daily 3 and how it came into being. I realize that I have told this story many times but never have written it down for those of you out in internet land.

Here is how things shook down...

Last year, we were planning on putting SR's house on the market after July 4 weekend. We had been actively looking for a home but had yet to find what felt like the next step. What we didnt expect to happen, happened. House sold in 4 days, 20 day escrow, all CASH.... How does that happen?

So life went into complete get'er done mode..... You know what I mean, the panic of the oh shit, we have 20 days... pack, find a house and oh, move....

Well, lets just say, we didnt find a house in 20 days. We ended up moving into what I call a cozy original bungalow (are you reading between the lines?) So original that we had one outlet in the kitchen! yup 1 : )

Mentally, I knew moving into this place, it was temporary. We had been trying to buy a house we had our eyes on for 100 days(see post of house buying)... thinking it would come through...so,it was a transitional place for maybe 3 months.... I truly believe you can do anything you set your mind to, even  living in the cozy bungalow with an insane commute to get the boys to school and their sporting activities.It was only temporary I kept telling myself. 

3 months turned into 7....

After we moved. The dust settled so to speak and I was staring at what I had to work with. I pulled up my big girl panties and said, I can make anyplace feel like home.

I did need to call in support, at least to paint. I knew that living with dark paneling was not going to work. A fresh coat of white paint went up and made a significant difference, at least for me.

I would sit in the house and get a bit down. It was pretty craptastic,I'm not gonna lie. I decided that the way I was going to change my mindset was to take 3 pictures a day of appreciation.Things that made me smile, things that might not make a difference to anyone else, but for me on that day, it did.

 The house  buying situation was so aggravating, I needed to do something to shift my thinking. This is where my #daily 3 began.  My first #daily 3 posted Oct 1,2014.

My dinner at the Habit, morning coffee with coconut oil and being able to enjoy some time with Mitchell while the little's were at football practice. Like I said, not earth shattering by any means... but this was my transitional life...

In the past year, we bought the RNB (Rogers n Brachmann for those unfamiliar) Demo, remodel and move has happened. Commute time has been replaced with boys riding bikes to school and friends knocking at the door wondering if boys can play... : )

I continued posting, for my own sanity mostly. What happened next was such a huge surprise.... I started receiving emails... from people who found my posts and were thanking me... I thought to myself... why? my daily 3 have been purely a therapeutic posting for me.. how could my daily 3 make a difference in other peoples lives? interesting how life works...

So while I really was challenged to live in that cozy original bungalow in Reseda, something so good emerged....

This has been quite a journey..In all truth, I am a bit taken aback by the response but think it is pretty awesome. It makes my heart happy to know that my personal daily 3 has turned into something that others look for. It has become fun within the family and friends what will make it into my 3... These are snapshots of my life, what make me smile...

So there you have it my story of #daily3 

If you are interested in #daily3, you can follow on instagram Blisswithmac, Face Book or Twitter.... although, in all honesty, I'm not so Twitter savvy.... 

I want to personally thank all of you that have followed this journey of #daily3 from the beginning. I look forward to seeing where it goes from here! Please feel free to share my links : )


as of right now, I'm not sure what pictures I have for tonight (well that's a little fib, I do know one or two).... stay tuned! 

Wishing you all the best
with Peace, Love, Blessings and Gratitude
Mac

thinking back on our move day(graphic picts fyi)

To say that I was burning the candle at both ends would have been quite accurate.

Completed my first tri March 1
Big move Day to RNB 1 week later March 22
Spring Break 2015 in Maui April 4-14

Soo much. Too much...

Let me take you back to March 22, our move day.

I had requested the same crew of movers that moved us back in Aug to be our crew this time. They really were quite amazing. I laugh because their primary language is Russian. They spoke little and broken English , yet we were able to laugh and enjoy the otherwise stressful day.

Here was the plan:

Pack up the rental, bring to RNB...
Drive to storage, pack up 2 storage units .. return to RNB

Sounds busy but doable....

The rental was basically packed up except for a few random items... I put Finn and the boys in the truck and headed to RNB to wait for the movers....

I had about an hour...

In that time, Jack and Lucas decided to ride their bikes.... sure I thought....

Then I get the text

I think you should get some band-aids...

You see I just gone up the store to get laundry detergent.....yup..

I've done enough wound care and know this is far more in need than just some band-aids...

So off to find an after hours pediatric care....

While Steve was overseeing all the moving activities, this was where I was being a mom

reality check...

he saw me going to take a pic...such a boy

after 9 stitches and a full debriedment of gravel this was his cleaned up knee

After our time at the clinic, we returned home... Remember we were in the throws of moving!

Jack and I arrived back to the house and I receive a phone call from Steve asking for the truck and some help at storage.... Off I went...

to say movers were hustling would be an understatement. You see there is a check out time where the storage facility(although all outside) states that all gates LOCK at 7pm..

7:05 I am inputting the code to open the gate..... instead of a green light..... contact manager red light was flashing.... uh oh.

I open the walk through gate, knock... nobody... I call... nobody... wtf.... 5 Russian movers, a huge ass truck pack to the brim, Steve's truck and my truck... and we are locked in! Cant be happening...

I immediately start calling all numbers I could find.... Leaving voice messages.... uh, hello, we are sitting at the gate, movers are here and we are locked in... we need some help please....

15 mins pass....

not gonna lie, I was trying not to panic but it was pretty hard...

The lead man in charge of the moving crew Roman, calls for Steve.... in his thick accent...

walks back to his truck and returns with  his tool bag.


wa-la gate opens..

The one really quite talkative one of the group says, "leave it to us Russians to be resourceful!"

The gate was not broken, all was returned to working order except we were on the outside...

I kept thinking , this is absolutely crazy, we cant be LOCKED INSIDE.... 

I asked once we returned to the RNB, had they ever been locked in a storage facility before.... they replied nope.... so we had a good laugh  being the first time and continued to unload the truck....

At the end of the very long day,  everyone was exhausted and I opened a bottle of champagne with our red solo cups and the movers and we toasted to another successful move....


I walked into the house after they left and saw this

its all about the journey...

So that in a nut-shell is the story of our big move to the RNB.

Right now, we still have plenty of boxes to unpack but we are in Maui resting.... I will blog again while I am here but for right now... I might go take a nap...


Wishing you all the best,

Triathlon completed and move to RnB happened!!!

Wow, what a whirlwind this past month has been!

I am reflecting on the last month, but specifically the last couple of weeks. I need to be candid, my brain is um foggy. I'm not going to be as clever of a writer today. I am going to probably leave out lots of stories but here I am!

The last time I blogged we were waist deep in the throws of remodeling at  RNB (Rogers n Brachmann) for our move on March 22. My triathlon was March 15th, exactly one week before the big move.

The timing was not great but as I say in life, it was happening this way for a reason... I knew I had to dig deep...

I will start with my triathlon, Superseal 2015, Coronado California.

For those who know me personally, know this  little tid bit already. I lived in Coronado before moving to Minnesota. It is my old stomping grounds . It is one of my most favorite places, the sand is so soft, the beach is so vast and the vibe is simply good. It is where I brought by babies home from the hospital. The race was on the same stretch of highway that I pushed their jog stroller to get back into shape after each pregnancy.

March 14th we loaded up the truck and  headed down to Coronado.  I had chosen this particular triathlon because of the location (very flat) and because I got to see many dear friends that live on the island. Mentally, I felt as thought my life would be coming full circle in a way, my old life as a  Seal Team wife and my life now. I thought  coming back to visit Coronado for my first triathlon benefiting Naval Special Warfare Families/Kids would be a perfect way to bring the two together. 

I need to say that I was filled with excitement, anticipation, anxiety and oh the butterflies!!

Saturday after I picked up my race packet, we drove through our old neighborhood : ) on our way to the teams where we were meeting some friends. Mitchell and Jack hadn't been to the Teams since we moved in 2005. Although they spent plenty of time there in their little years while Scott was still active in the Teams, they were really looking at things for the first time. Their dad dedicated his entire military career serving this country in the Seal Teams. It seemed natural to now come back and allow them an opportunity to get a better understanding of what it meant when they would say that their dad was a Navy Seal.  

An old friend was able to take the boys through the compounds and explained to them Team history and  what the Seal  Teams were and are all about. It was fascinating to observe since things have changed so much since we left. After Seal Team history 101 was completed, the boys , being boys wanted to go out to the  'O'course. 'O'  = obstacle.... and boy are they big.... 

 I loved how the Hotel Del showed up on our GPS

Rick explaining how they had to jump to get to the top... didnt happen...not quite tall enough yet..

There were safety rules in effect... only able to climb to the middle of the cargo net... he was not going to have to climb up and talk one of them down in his  jeans and flip flops..... : )

 I was proud of Mitchell on this one. He overcame his fear of heights, well, not really, he was really scared but he did make it all the way across and back down...

this was the first obstacle they took on, Mitchell was the only one tall enough to scale across the wall...  he was definitely nervous since it doesn't look like he is high off the ground, but he was...

so ya wanna be a frogman? 

The grinder...

Jack wanting to stand up where the instructors lead PT.

After we spent the afternoon with Rick and Mickey we were off to have dinner with other old dear friends. Lori and Jeff I have known for over 25 years. Dinner was amazing and Jeff decided that he would do the tri with me!  After a few beers, he was all in!!.... when we got back to their house, he pulled out his wet suit, got his bike ready and was needing to do some laundry before the early wake up ...

We  were having such a great time at dinner, I didn't even think about taking my phone out and getting pictures of all of us! Have you ever seen those sayings, about being in the moment... that's exactly where I was... enjoying all the laughter and company of great friends that I hadn't seen in over a decade. Although we were are all a few years older, it was like no time had passed and we picked up where we had left things so many years ago!


Later that night at the hotel, the butterflies started to kick in.

 I had to be at the transition area at 5:30 am.

I began thinking about the swim... You see, when the boys were little, I didn't like them playing in the bay water. It is typically a bit more polluted. But as life is, the EXACT WATER I DIDN'T ALLOW MY KIDDOS IN AS KIDS, I WAS NOW SWIMMING IN FOR MY TRI!!!  Yup, absolutely hilarious! Talk about full circle...sheez...

The morning came quickly.... we arrived at the Silver Strand Beach which is where the transition area was set up. I saw Jeff in the darkness with his arms folded shaking his head.... this is a bad idea.... this is a bad idea....I was laughing.... thinking, no really it is gonna be a great lets make some memories!

I welcomed March 15th from my transition area

 As I waited patiently for my wave to come I was quiet on my towel and observing the many waves that went before me. I watched different participants techniques... taking it all in

My mindset was this... Swim .. Bike... and  Run. Enjoy myself, smile and be thankful when I cross the finish line. Don't think about my times.... enjoy the journey and all the hours I spent preparing for this very day.

Here is a funny little story... I thought ya know, I should probably make sure that my goggles wont leak during the swim. I will take a quick swim before the start whistle and make sure I was good to go.... I walked into the water and submerged myself.... what I quickly realized was that there was ZERO VISIBILITY, I mean ZERO!!!

When our wave started lets just say, I got kicked in my face more times that I want to remember and had experienced the strange feeling of adults swimming directly into my side body because of being disorientated!

I figured out quickly to separate myself just enough so the kicking would stop. then I swam... not thinking about how gross the water was .... I kept thinking just don't swallow....ick...

I finished the swim and got out of the water with some cramping in my calves.... I shuffled my way back to the transition area... T1 wasnt too quick but  I kept moving..

Off I went.... 26 miles on the Silver Strand....

The bike was harder than I imagined. In all honesty I felt like I was a pretty strong biker... I started to doubt myself when others were seriously whizzing by me.... I was averaging 17 mph... with crosswinds... it felt like I was standing still.... crazy... humbling....26 miles....hard...

I got off the bike and the heat wave that had come over Southern California was in full swing.

I had watched a few You Tube Videos about transitions. How the most challenging from a muscular perspective was from the bike to the run... T2.... Mentally, I remembered this and was not going to push myself the first 2 miles of the run.

I saw Jeff when I was headed back for T2... I asked him if he was ready to run... he looked at me... said he started to run about 1 mile and said... f'** it, it is WAY to hot... . We bumped knuckles and I said I'm going to go run and finish what I started.... I was off, slowly...

The first two miles were softer sand, so I didn't push myself. Mentally, I was talking to myself about how I needed to let my legs get used to running. Allowing my body to slowly and gently get used to jogging. I also was thankful for all my hours teaching hot yoga. My body was used to being in heat, granted not quite like this but I was willing to tell myself many things to get away from how sucky hot it was....

Every step I took, I was thankful. I passed landmarks on the trail that reminded me of times pushing the boys in their strollers. It made my heart and soul happy and at peace.

The finish line came ..... I did it, .9 mile swim, 26 mile bike and 6 mile run...

I believe I said while crossing, holy shit it's hot, someone handed me an iced wash cloth and I went to drink a much deserved beer...

What  an adventure it has been. I have proven to myself again that taking small steps towards a goal is something that can be achieved by all. I was able to train for and complete an Olympic distance triathlon in 12 weeks.I look forward to more triathlon's in my future, ( Malibu in Sept ) just not right now... At the moment, I'm in unpacking mode and wrapping my mind around that we are heading off to Maui on Sat! Some yoga and time on the SUPs are on my agenda. Time for some much needed rest and recovery...


Wishing you all the best,

Last few weeks have been a wild ride :)

My last two weeks have been a bit of a blur.

First of all, as most of you know that have read my blog, that the renovation of  RNB is in full swing with lots of activity. French doors have gone in, inspector signed off on all the framing and electrical, so drywall is being hung to close up walls. Oh and the big one, our kitchen cabinets are starting to give life to the kitchen space.  It is a bit like Humpy Dumpty, watching the pieces being put back together again....


RNB (Rogers n Brachmann) is the name of our new house. It has been a labor of love and patience. For those of you that have remodeled know, it is quite a process. This past week, all new windows were put in replacing the aluminum windows original to the house.

I have recognized certain adult milestones in life. Buying my first new car , appreciating large appliances ( new washer/dryer, or refrigerator) .. now? WINDOWS..... takes being an adult to  the next level... I truly had no idea how much the energy and feel of a room changes with replacing windows!

To say the least, much time and energy is being spent making this house become our home. As with most things, I am trying to appreciate each day and the steps that are going into making our RNB to life.

I had written a few weeks ago about a sick bug going through the house. As a mom, I know that you have to allow the sickness go through it's course. Well,  I finally decided it was time to take Mitchell in to see the doctor. I thought he might have a sinus infection... Well, to my complete surprise, he has full blown walking pneumonia!

Since the doc wanted him to do a breathing treatment, I went and picked up the little's from school. Jack had been seen a few weeks prior.. I thought MAYBE I should get his lungs checked since I felt a bit guilty about Mitchell being so sick.... Wouldn't you know it! He also had walking pneumonia, just the beginning phase.....

Off we left with prescriptions for Z packs and nebulizer treatments... sheez....Not going to lie, I felt some guilt that I had not taken them earlier... The whole thought process of allowing the sickness to run it's course, kinda backfired.... poor kids... In the rule of 10-10-10 I am crossing my fingers they wont remember this one.... :)


Today I am happy to report, health has returned to the house and boys are starting return to their more normal selves...


The pinky swear I had with Carlos, (see above picture with him being goofy) was for the RNB to be ready Valentines day.... Since life happens,the move into  RNB is not happening this weekend..... I remember back to last Valentines's Day, I was wisked away to Santa Barbara by SR. This year is a bit different....  a water polo tournament  in Orange County... but we were smart enough to get 2 hotel rooms instead of sharing one! Life happens! The key is to make the best of all situations making memories along the way!

Happy belated Valentine's Day : )

Wishing you all the best,

learning self- care

I think it is no coincidence that my recovery week on my triathlon training program and the weather here in southern California have been  perfectly in sync ! I have been feeling a bit under the weather, not sick, but not 100%. You know that I'm talking about, just feeling meh....

You see, the weather has been rainy, overcast and just a bit ho hum. Perfect for me to be quiet and allow my body to recharge and rest. I am not  feeling any guilt about not getting in a ride or trying to squeeze in swim time. It's been absolutely perfect for me.

This week in my house of boys, we have been dealing with some under the weather kiddos. As many of you know that have kids, the sickness takes it's turn, going from one to the next...

As a mom, I try to instill some knowledge for each about what they need to do to be able to help themselves, i.e. self-care. I'm not talking about the basic's like, drink plenty of fluids, rest, go to bed early etc. What I am talking about is the individual needs that each one of the boys have that is different from the others.

 I have one boy that will eat cheese any chance he is given, here is downside, he gets congested and ends up with far too much snot. He is the apple from my tree. I am not able to consume dairy without major congestion either.   When he gets sick, stand by. You see, he is a nose breather. Ever since he was little , if his nose was stuffed, his world was turned upside down. As he has gotten older, I just look at him and say,  OPEN YOUR MOUTH... BREATHE... sounds silly.. trust me, I know...

The other day on the drive to school, he asked me why I was not  putting cheese on his sandwiches. I explained that the reason I have been omitting the cheese has been because of his increased levels of congestion.(in my house we just call it snot, but I think it might be gross to type so much in this post)  He then went on to tell me that he does not want to admit that he is not able to eat his favorite food. I tried explaining that he didnt need to completely remove dairy from his diet but when he is sick and congested, he needs to know when to back off, not adding fuel to the fire.

The other night, I was having a conversation with another polo mom about a similar topic. Her son was starting to get acne. Her first step, she began removing all processed foods that he was eating (chips, soda etc) and guess what? wha-la... acne was gone within 2 weeks!

 Her son recognized that although he wants to be a typical teenage boy, eating whatever he wants, he realized he is unable eat certain foods without consequence. I consider this awareness a tremendous step forward in maturity..

So...

I used the example of the other boy and processed food. I thought it would help to give better understanding of food choices and  possible consequences.  My intention was to  plant the seed but at the moment I am not sure how well the seed stuck but I will continue to water and bring awareness..


Definition of self-care:the care of ones self without medical, professional,or other assistance or oversight.


Learning self-care..

Self-care has many different faces. One day it could be getting more sleep or resting while your body recharges. It could be eating well, fueling your body with the foods that make it feel best or simply drinking more water.Self care could be exercising more, taking a yoga class or walking the dog!  On the flip side, self-care could  be saying no to certain situations or asking for help instead of taking everything on yourself.

 Self care to me is about creating boundaries for myself, putting my needs on top of the priority list. I recognize that I have others that depend of me. If I am not feeling up to snuff, I am not going to be much good for the others in my life. It is refueling my own tank. This week, it has been about rest, taking lots of liquid herbs and allowing my body to recharge.

The body we have been given is such an amazing gift. If you listen closely, it will tell you what it needs. The signals it gives you are little windows to connect  with your intuition. The more you are able to listen, the better your mind body connection and learning what is best for you in that moment.

So as this week comes to a close, I welcome you to listen to your body and what it is asking from you. This is a small step forward in learning how to live a healthier life.


Wishing you all the best,