boys brains

First off, I don't know what it is like to raise girls. I think God gave me boys for a good reason.

Our house is in the full fledged puberty years... on varying levels ...For Lent a few years ago  I gave up yelling. I know can you believe it? My truth was it was the most challenging Lenten promise I ever made,(including no sips of wine.... ) what it made me realize is that if you are quiet you learn...so where on earth am I going with this?

I am watching how these boys pick and choose what is important to them, hair, bathing, clothing, socks, image... how different each of them are. What is considered important to one, is not even a second thought to the other.

I've always considered myself  a low/high maintenance kinda girl. I choose eating organic fruits and vegetables and buying a t-shirt at target. The same thing is happening when I observe the boys. I am watching them choose where they are high maintenance and where they are low. It is simply fascinating.

I wonder if others have thought of this concept? At the end of the day it becomes about balance and priorities. 


I believe that with age comes some amazing benefits of learning and experiencing life lessons. For example, I have some seriously thick hair. I have gone to less expensive hair salons in my younger years and gotten some really shitty hair cuts. No joke, I've even walked out with crooked bangs once! I've learned that I have no problems spending the time and money finding a hair stylist that knows what they are doing. That is where my high maintenance shines like a beacon....

I think for boys it maybe easier than my friends that have girls. At least on the clothing level, what they wear, brand names etc. I could be wrong. I know living in a suburb of  Los Angeles it is so far off from what I consider normal kid clothes.  Back in my early years, growing up in Stockton Ca, I wanted dittos and that yellow Sony Walkman...those were my high maintenance things.

Today, the boys have a completely different priorities. Starting middle school, SOCKS have been important, apparently it's a way to express their individuality.....I have to say, that since going into high school, socks are still important but not as high on the totem pole as they used to be...Mitchell in 11th is the boy who cares the least about his socks! Name brands in general have never been important to him. I believe that because he has bigger priorities in his life, he really places zero importance on his day to day clothes... thus his low maintenance side... 

I had huge struggle with Mitchell about bleaching his hair, for months during his freshman  year.... You see I was thinking from a girls perspective... If you bleach, that's hair commitment! What I finally realized is that if he hated it, he could shave it off! It's all about perspective....

At the end of the day, I am doing my best to raise boys that are well rounded, productive members of society. I want them to have good manners, say please and thank you and look you in the eyes, when having a conversation, not down on their phone. 


Being a mom is  the most challenging job I have ever been given. It is also the hands down the most rewarding. I sure hope that they will be able to look back one day with a smile about their younger years...and what their high/low maintence items were...